The Waist Chain

It was a late Friday evening, I had hog tied myself for self-bondage session with hinge cuffs and leg cuffs all locked into my brand new waist chain. I was wearing a long sleeve thermal shirt, a pair of loose cargo shorts and a pair of suspenders to keep the cargo shorts from falling off as I would be crawling around to get keys. For safety I had no gag and I had a cell phone within reach with several emergency numbers programmed on speed dial. I had used a very short padlocked chain to leash my leg cuffs to one of the legs of my upright piano. The piano weighs in at about 400lbs and having moved it several times there was no way someone hogtied was going to budge it, particularly on carpeting. The key to the padlock was held by a magnetic lock on the ceiling above me. The power to the mag-lock was supplied by an extension cord that ran along the ceiling and through a doorway and plugged into a simple electric light timer plugged into a living room outlet. There was no way to get to the outlet while leashed to the piano leg or reach the power cord on the ceiling when hogtied on the floor. To make sure nothing bad happened when the mag-lock was de-energized and the key dropped to the ground I attached a piece of fish line to the padlock key. The fish line dangled down so I could touch it with my hogtied hands. The keys to the padlock connecting my leg cuff chain to my waist chain were in bedroom on the bed. The keys to the hinge cuffs were in the kitchen on the counter. 

I had had a good time rolling around on the floor for 2 hrs in an inescapable hogtie. Right on schedule the timer turned the power off and the key dropped in front of my nose. I used the fish line to pull the keys to me and then quickly unlocked the chain that leashed me to the piano leg. Still hogtied I crawled and wiggled my way into the bedroom. I pulled the coverlet on the bed towards me until the padlock key fell off on the floor then I maneuvered until I got the key in my hands and was able to unlock the padlock and remove the hogtie chain. I straightened up, it felt great after 2 hrs. My hands and legs were still shackled but the uncomfortable part was over. 

I shuffled into the kitchen and got the key to handcuffs and started feeling working on getting the key into the handcuff keyhole. This always takes a few minutes. After several minutes not having any success I went to a mirror to see. I quickly discovered I had locked the cuffs with the keyholes facing away from my fingers. I was usually careful about that but I had screwed up this time. I wasn’t worried because I had done this once before and had been able to get my hands in front of me by scooting them by my legs. 

I wiggled the waist chain down and found it was too small to get over my hips. Stuck !!!, I wasn’t worried because I had a very good friend that did some bondage of his own and knew I did. We had agreed to be each others backup. I had bailed him out twice, and though I had never had to use bail me out, there was a first time for everything. I gave up on the handcuffs and kneeled down to unlock the leg cuffs. These were standard peerless leg irons with about 12” chain between the cuffs. The waist chain also prevented getting the leg cuffs unlocked because my hands couldn’t reach the leg-cuff keyholes to get the key in. After several minutes of different contortions and combinations to get a better reach, I admitted defeat. I was beginning to really hate the waist chain. I got my cell phone and called my friend. 

Given the hour I thought maybe I would wake him up, he had called me at 4AM once, but he answered cheerfully on the 3rd ring. After the pleasantries were exchanged, I asked him what he was up to tonight, and found out he was in Mammoth snowboarding for the weekend and having a great time. He obviously wasn’t going to be of much help so I didn’t tell him the problem; we chatted for a couple of more minutes and then hung up. I tried a couple of schemes with a corn tongs and a pair of cheap pliers to get the handcuff key into the keyholes, no luck. I didn’t have bolt cutters to cut the waist chain. I even got on the internet and went to the self bondage channel on the bondage network, to get some ideas. The best suggestion from those helpful people was to cut my hand off with a steak knife, suggesting I sterilize the knife first over the stove burner. Thanks guys, you were a huge help!!! I finally gave up and admitted that I wasn’t getting free without help. 

The only possibility left was to call the police and tell them my problem. However embarrassing that might be, I wasn’t really doing anything illegal. This was obviously not an emergency so I didn’t use 911. I got the phone book out and found a non emergency number to a police station that was ¾ of a mile from my home. When I called an officer answered. I told him the situation. The officer asked if I had the keys, I said yes. I gave him my address when he asked, then he put me on hold for a few minutes. When he came back on he told me that it was very busy night and since this wasn’t an emergency he couldn’t get a patrol car until sometime tomorrow morning. 

I HAD to be at work the following morning. I had had period of flakiness and irresponsibility that had almost gotten me fired from my job. That together with a DUI and some other stupid scraps had landed me in a situation where I would lose my job if I didn’t show up for work. With the recession I couldn’t afford to lose my job. The officer was sympathetic with my whining but recommended that I get someone to drive me to the station. I told him, if I could get someone to drive me to the station I would have them unlock the handcuffs. He said he was sorry, but it wasn’t an emergency. I finally told him I would figure out a way to get down there. The officer told me to bring ID when I came, they would ask for it. 

I thought about calling a taxi, but I really didn’t want to bring anyone else into it. Most of my friends either lived out of state. The other friends I had were coworkers from work. I couldn’t think of anyone else I really wanted to call. The police station wasn’t really that far from my home; I would only have to cross one major street that was generally quiet at this time of night. I wasn’t wild about the idea, but I decided to walk it. Forgotten was that it was Friday night and there was an all night dance club at the one of the intersections I would have to cross. 

I decided to leave my wallet at home. I live in a working class, but reasonably quiet, neighborhood. Its not greatest neighborhood and people did occasionally get mugged. I brought some of the cash, about $30, I had in my wallet, my cell phone, driver’s license and the handcuff keys and started on my way. I was in shorts but it was 55F (13C) so it was cool, but not uncomfortable temperature walking distances in legcuffs is sweaty work. 

Unfortunately, the walk to the police station was not uneventful, but I won’t write about it here. Normally this walk would have taken 20 minutes, with the leg cuffs on and other things that happened, it took nearly 2 hrs. By the time I got to the station, I was shaking life a leaf, nervous, embarrassed and had an overwhelming desire to get this over with as quickly as possible. After I got myself calmed down with a few deep breaths and looked around. The place looked like a DMV (Department of Motor Vehicle) office, There was one uniformed clerk sitting at a desk behind a clear Plexiglas partition, probably bullet proof, a small writing ledge and a narrow opening at the base of the window to pass things through. Unfortunately like every DMV I've been in there was a line of at least a dozen people waiting to get to the window. No one was handcuffed except me in the entire place. I just got in line. 

Once in line, no one seemed to take much notice of me. No more than a minute or two after I got in line two guys, about my age and obviously gay, came through the door behind me. They both looked around as I did then asked me if this was the line to pay parking tickets. I told them I didn’t know, but guessed so. They were friendly and after a few minutes of exchanging pleasantries they finally asked why I was handcuffed. I decided they seemed cool enough to try and end this torture quickly. I told them that I had gotten myself stuck and was here to get them off. Then I asked if they would unlock me and showed them the keys. They looked at each other one of them said laughed and said loudly, no way Dude, you probably escaped from somewhere. Now everybody in line knew, people further back in line were whispering and pointing at me. I felt really self-conscious and turned back to the front and pretended I was on a nice quiet beach. 

Facing front I unavoidably eavesdropped on a cell phone conversation of the person in front of me. The lady was obviously upset and was talking loudly to someone. After several minutes I figured out that that her father had been picked up for DUI and she was trying to get him bailed out. Having been through the experience I knew that routine. The conversation kept on several minutes with the lady getting more and more frustrated. Finally, the phone call ended with a loud expletive, and then the lady looked at me and the guys behind me sheepishly and said I’m sorry. We all shrugged and told her not to worry about it. Finally Lisa stuck out her hand to the guys behind me and introduced herself. They shook, and then she stuck out her hand to me. For some reason she hadn’t noticed I was handcuffed. Not knowing what else to do, I told her my name, and then showed the cuffs to her. She was startled and said Oh!!!, and she pointedly ignored me, to talk with the guys in back of me. 

The line had been inching forward the entire time, eventually Lisa got to the window. After some talking back and forth the clerk handed her a clipboard with some papers on it through the window told her to step to the side and fill out the papers. Then she looked at me and motioned me up to the window and asked if she could help me. I showed her the handcuffs told her I was stuck and couldn’t get them off. She asked how I gotten them on, I told her that I had put them on myself and had the keys. I could hear the guys behind me laughing. Without a flicker of interest she asked for my ID. When I found out I couldn’t reach up high enough to push my license through the slot, one of the guys behind me, helpfully stepped up and pushed it through the slot to the clerk. The clerk typed my information into the computer; she looked at the screen for a couple of seconds then picked up a phone and spoke with someone. When she hung up she told me someone would be out to help me in a minute. She had me to step aside, and motioned the guys behind me to come forward. 

I was left standing next to the partition with the people sitting in the waiting area staring at me. I felt like the kid wearing the dunce cap sitting on a stool in front of the class in the old movies. After what seemed like forever, probably only a minute or two, the door behind me buzzed and opened, and an officer told me to come inside. When I got inside he told me to face the wall and that I was under arrest for DUI parole violations and an unpaid reckless driving ticket. He asked if I had any sharp objects or weapons in my pockets. I told him no, he patted me down and emptied my pockets. 

When he finished the search and allowed me turn around. He asked me if these were the keys to the handcuffs, I told him yes. Then he asked why I how I gotten them on. I didn’t tell him the entire self bondage hogtie earlier, just that I had been playing with them and gotten myself stuck because of the waist chain. Finally he asked where I had gotten the cuffs. I told him that I had bought them on the internet. He seemed satisfied and started putting my stuff into a plastic bag. I asked about the violations and the unpaid ticked, he told me they had run my license and we found a year old unpaid reckless driving citation that had gone to bench warrant. When I protested I had paid the ticket. He told me that the ticket was no longer active on the computer, the warrant was still active; he told me that it sometimes happens if the ticket is paid late. The real problem was I had missed three mandatory drug and alcohol sessions that were part of my DUI conviction parole agreement I had made a year earlier. I told him that I had had to work and I had already made them up and cleared it with the instructor, which was true. He told me it’s actually good this happened; this would have popped the next time you got a traffic citation and we would have had to haul you in. Then he told me he would check and get this cleared up as quickly as he could and get me on my way. However, until this was cleared up I was under arrest. He dumped all the stuff I had brought in a plastic bag and wrote my name on it. 

He led me down a hallway and into a large room totally packed with drunks and gangbangers shackled to benches with their hands cuffed behind their backs. On the floor between the bench rows were two more rows of people in plastic cuffs sitting on the floor. The room was noisy and smelled of puke and stale sweat, like a locker room. The cop looked around for an open space, and then said you really don’t want to be in here. He led me back out the way we came and back down the hallway to the waiting area. He told to go back into the waiting area. I told him that was fine, but could I please get the cuffs off. He said no without any explanation, then he warned me not to leave or I would be charged with escape. I said thank you I won’t; like I was going to run away after all this with no keys, no cell phone and still restrained. 

The waiting room was full I eventually spotted an empty seat but I had to maneuver down a row of people to get to it. My leg cuff chain got tangled under somebody’s foot and I almost took a header into someone’s lap. I finally got to my seat and I sat there for at least ½ hr. I finally got uncomfortable in the hard plastic seat. I got up and, with more grace this time, shuffled down the row and out to the main aisle. I went to the back of the room and pretended I was interested in the bulletin board. To be fair the top 10 most wanted list actually was interesting; the rest, not so much. As I worked my way along the bulletin boards I came across several people as bored as I was, most would look at me and move on without a word, and to the others I said Hi. I wound up talking with one man for awhile. His son had been arrested for GTA and he had been waiting for him to be processed out since midnight. He asked why I was out here with handcuffs. I told him that it was mistaken reckless driving ticket and they didn’t have room in the holding area in back. 

The room had a couple of TV sets for people to watch while they waited, the sound was off. We were gazing at the TV when it showed a clip from the Dallas/Giant game from the prior weekend. I lamented that my Cowboys had been robbed and should have won. I knew they didn’t really deserve to win but I’m a Cowboy fan. Their running back had fumbled the ball early in the game and their field goal kicker was going through a bad patch. The guy I was talking to turned out to be a diehard Giants fan. We got started talking football and the conversation soon got a little loud in a friendly way. Some other people heard the conversation and joined in, primarily because it was more interesting then just sitting there staring into space. Within minutes we had a number of people talking and waving their arms around. One guy in jest pretended to get into my face; he was Redskins fan, and pantomimed tapping my chest with his finger and kicking dirt on my shoes. I laughed and said that it wasn’t fair; I couldn’t wave my arms or kick dirt on his shoes. Everyone started laughing; the neat part was everyone forgot that I was in handcuffs. 

I got called up to the window again because the clerk needed more information. When she was done with me I headed back towards my posse in the back of the room. On the way back Lisa stopped me and said Hi, and told me that she was sorry she had been rude earlier. I told her it was fine, I understood. Then she asked why I was still here and in the handcuffs. I told her I was under arrest for an unpaid traffic citation that I had paid, and the cops were checking it out. I asked about her dad and she told me that he was in processing somewhere in the building but she had the bail paperwork done. The cops had told her it would be a couple of more hours before they could process him out. I told her that I had been in back and it was incredibly busy back there. 

We talked for a while longer then she told me wanted to get a Coke and go out and smoke a cigarette. She asked me to join her. I said fine, I told the clerk, that I was going outside to the smoking area. I didn’t want them to think I was escaping. When we got out there, there were at least a dozen people, all smoking. The people checked out the handcuffs, I had gotten used to being in them and people staring and ignored as best I could. Lisa lit up and then asked me asked me if I wanted one. I told her that I would but I couldn’t light it. She took another one out of the pack; chain lit it and put one between my lips. We talked for quite a while. She told me she was a newly divorced single mom with two kids living with her alcoholic father, her no good husband etc. Basically I didn’t have to talk at all just make the proper sympathetic noises at the right times. She finally asked how I had gotten stuck, I explained the whole thing to her, she thought it was very strange and laughed. I could tell she thought I was crazy and deserved what had happened. 

Finally, the Giants fan guy I had been talking to earlier opened the door and said that the clerk wanted to see me. Lisa stubbed out both our cigarettes. I quickly screwed up my courage and asked for Lisa’s phone number and so we could go out sometime. I got an immediate NO, then you seem nice, but I’m not going out with a guy in handcuffs I met at a police station. Then she walked back in the waiting area. After that flaming several people were chuckling, I went back into the waiting area and went to the window. The clerk said I was free to go and that someone would be out to take off the cuffs in a few minutes. 

After a few minutes the door opened and the same cop that had talked to me earlier motioned me back inside. He said he was sorry about the inconvenience, I was cleared. He unlocked my handcuffs and handed me the bag with my stuff in it. I had to unlock my own leg cuffs. I walked out the door, my posse still at the back of the room cheered and I said goodnight. I think they were a little puzzled why I was carrying the hand and leg cuffs in the plastic bag. 

19.12.09