Struggle

Well today is a day off for me. The sun is shinning and the temperature is finally warm enough to be outside. The last of the snow in my back yard has melted. I took out two wood pallets and laid them on the patio right beside the privacy fence. I went back into the house and took off all my clothes. I put on my wrist cuffs and locked them. Next I grabbed two ice release bottles. One an 8 oz bottle, the other a 12 oz bottle, both with a string attached to a key at the bottom of the bottle, both with measured amounts of water and both very frozen. Taking three 1" nylon web straps, like the ones you use on backpack, a 12' length of chain, 2 padlocks and a blindfold, I headed outside. I positioned my release devices close to where my hands would be. I had arranged my back yard so that no one could see me, however if you peek over the fence and look straight down you could see everything.

I am a male, 5’ 10” tall, about 185 lb. I have brown hair and green eyes. I’m told that I have a nice build and a tight ass. My cock is average size when erect gets very red and stands perpendicular to my belly when erect. I laid down on the pallets and spread my legs wide and used the web straps to quickly tie each knee to a board of the pallet. The warm sun felt good on my white balls as I stroked myself to an erection. I lay back and positioned my arms over my head, making sure that I could reach the ice releases. Using the last web strap I loosely fastened it around my neck and to a board of the pallet. I slipped the blindfold over my eyes protecting them from the sun.

Carefully I tightened the strap around my neck so that it was snug, but not uncomfortable. I used the padlocks and chain to bind my wrists close together, about 4 inches part. The free end of the chain and the last padlock would be used to fasten my outstretched arms to an eyebolt that I had put into a fence post many days earlier. I stretched my arms over my head and checked that I could still reach the ice release devices. I threaded the padlock into the chain and through the eyebolt. I took a deep breath, started to close the padlock ...... and changed my mind.

Okay, why on the earth am I on my back patio, naked, with a raging erection, about to tie myself spread eagle?

If I do this I will not be able to touch my erection. What if someone comes to the back gate and discovers me? Am I crazy?

I try to struggle, but I can barely move. Did they read the electric meter already? It’s just on the other side of the fence?

My bound hands move down to stroke my erection. I try to thrust my hips about, but unlike a bed which gives no matter how tightly bound, there is very little movement. I moan softly to myself. What's that sound? Is the neighbour home? I'm not gagged and the danger of being heard and discovered is very real.

I move my outstretched hands back over my head and play with the padlock. I fasten it to the chain and then pretend to lock it to the eyebolt. My groin swells with blood. I take the padlock off the eyebolt and again reach for my erection. That feels very good as I swiftly stroke my red engorged shaft. I take a large breath, hold it and let go of my erection. As the cool air replaces my warm hands, I stretch my arms out. My hands find the chain binding the cuffs together and slip the padlock through it. With one smooth motion I thread the padlock into the eyebolt. Just one small move to align everything and I can close the padlock. Do it! Do it! A small voice in my brain cries out.

I struggle with my thoughts. There is no emergency release if I do this. I will have to wait for the ice to melt. My brain is on fire, I shouldn't do it, I shouldn't do it, ... but there is something else driving me. What if I’m discovered, the chance of discovery, although slim are real and the consequences could be severe. I push down on the padlock, it closes. Suddenly the mental struggle is over!! I've snapped the padlock closed!!

I feel a great rush, but suddenly I realise; nooooo…. It didn’t really close I missed the hole. I can feel the end of the hasp outside beside the hole.

A feeling of relief washes through me, but that demanding voice tells me to try again. I argue with myself, argue, with my common sense. I start to take the padlock out of the eyebolt, but suddenly my left hand grasps the padlock and tries to close it. Don’t do it, don’t do it, I softly mouth the words as my right hand also grasps the padlock. I relax, and take another deep breath. I’ve just got to try this … it won’t be that bad.

Everything will be okay, you’ll see, I tell myself. It’s okay, just do it, I hear myself whisper out loud. Suddenly the mental struggle is over, I've snapped the padlock closed.

“SHIT” I curse out loud.

Suddenly I regret what I've done. Damm, I swear I can feel my blood pressure rising and my erection stiffens and stands proud. I can hear my heart beating and I start to breathe rapidly. Fear rages throughout me. I lift my head but stop when the strap starts to choke me. I can move my feet and kick them about, but my knees hold fast. My hands grasp at the ice release bottles; futile gestures as the keys are still unattainable. A loud “fuck me”escape from my lips as I struggle helplessly against my three mild, but highly effective, bonds. Suddenly I stop moving, shit, what if someone heard me. Frozen with fear, I listen intently to the sounds of the neighbourhood.

Naked, blindfolded, absolutely helpless and very aroused I struggle silently against my bonds. I struggle with my thoughts, alternating between how stupid I am and how much I love what I’m experiencing. I struggle to keep my emotions under control, but find myself fighting uselessly against my bonds as my fear escalades.

Footsteps on the concrete sidewalk alert me to the approach of someone. I freeze, not daring to move a muscle. I cringe as I hear them try the gate latch. Fortunately I locked the gate, but …. If they peek over the top of the fence ….



This not a work of fiction, it is a session I did earlier today. I used a small amount of water in each bottle, which I thought would last about 1-2 hours. Turned out that the sun was more effective in melting the ice than I planned and I was able to escape after 25 minutes. While somewhat disappointed, I was also greatly relieved.

25.04.09