To get some measure of helplessness, I use the key frozen in ice-cubes method. This involves freezing keys to my restraints into ice-cubes, so I have to wait for the ice to melt before I can release myself. The larger the container in which I freeze the keys, the longer the resulting block of ice takes to melt, the longer is my bondage session. To give you some idea: the size of cube from a standard ice-cube tray, taken straight from the deep freeze takes about an hour to melt; a block frozen in a yoghurt pot takes three to four hours; a block from a 1kg. margarine tub takes up to six hours; one from a 2 litre ice-cream tub twelve hours or so; and one from a 5 litre twenty-four hours at least. I suspend the keys by threads from piece of plastic rod placed across the top, so the key is in the middle of the ice.

It may interest you to know that I actually tried out your scenario, the other day. Before going to work, I put two keys into a yoghurt pot; one to a pair of handcuffs, and one to a padlock. That evening, I took the pot into the living-room and placed it on the table, when upstairs to use the lavatory, undressed and returned with a drinking straw, a belt, the padlock and the handcuffs. I locked myself in the room, attached the handcuffs to a D - ring at the back of the belt, secured the belt tightly around my waist with the buckle at the front, and snapped on the cuffs around my wrists so that they were secured behind my back. All the controls to TV, stereo, etc. Are put out of reach, of course.

I began at about 7:30 and was able to recover the keys just after 11pm. I spent the intervening hours attempting to masturbate by rubbing myself against the arm of a wooden chair and just rolling around on the floor savouring the sheer joy of being bound. I must admit that, towards the end, I was beginning to feel the need to urinate. To get back the keys, I take the drinking straw in my mouth, which I previously place on the edge of the table, and drink the water so as not to make a mess. I am well aware that what I enjoy doing is fraught with danger, especially should there be an emergency, but I cannot help but take the risk.

Reading your letter has given my the idea of trying to reproduce it. I could use broadly the same set-up, but using a 5 litre to give me the extended time period, switching off the heating so that I will be really uncomfortable towards the end, and a bucket in which I could relive myself. What do you think of the idea, and have you any suggestions or improvements?

I have been going over the scene in my fantasies and have mulled over several variations. In one, I have nowhere to relieve myself and have to endure hours of stimulating agony trying to retain the contents of my distended bladder; while in another, I have a bucket to relieve myself, but no drinking water, so I am forced to drink my own urine. I can be really harsh with myself in my fantasies, and almost as hard on myself in reality, too. I do like to have an edge of suffering to my experiences. In all of them, though, you do have a key to the room, allowing you to burst in on me at any time a do with me as you wish. Another variation has you bending me over the table, reducing me to sobs by raining stinging slaps of your hand onto my bottom, and then entering me from behind, very forcefully, as I have been anticipating you to do all the time I have been bound and waiting.

Yours obediently,

slave s

Do not be offended, as I have probably misunderstood what you had written. The part of my letter describing your involvement was, of course, a fantasy: but, my description of the self-bondage session was real. As I have said, self-bondage is my only outlet.

Thank you for giving me new scenario which has me secured, spread-legged on my bed for one or two days. Although I am only your cyberslave, I take my commitment to you very seriously; if you give me an order, I feel myself honour-bound to carry it out, whether I like it or not. I will definitely be carry out your new scene, as soon as I can. You can imagine how exhilarating it will be for me to be in bondage, not because I wanted it, as is usual, but because you ordered it!

I have tried similar scenes before, tying my ankles to each bed-rail. Before, I have secured my hands in front of me so that I can masturbate. This is a delicious 'pain-and-pleasure' scene as, for my hands to reach my clitoris, I have to raise my torso from the bed using only me neck and back muscles; I am involved in a race between the pleasure of the former and the discomfort of the latter.

For longer periods of restrain, when urinating can be a problem, I have sometimes inserted a catheter into my bladder, so the urine collects into a bag. However, I get the impression that having to lie in a pool of my own urine is part of the scene; I think I can get come up with a way to do this without ruining my bed. The practicalities of arranging a supply of drinking water are more difficult: going without water for what might be two days could be dangerous, but I love to work these things out, though, as it is part of the thrill of anticipation.

Just to recap, to make sure I have correctly understood what you are ordering me to do. I am to be secured on a bed, face upwards, my ankles tied to each foot post so that my legs are spread wide, and my arms over my head cuffed to the headboard. Do you want me to have my wrists cuffed together, or secured to each side of the bed, spread-eagle? I can work the key in one of my of my pairs of handcuffs with one hand. I am to use a 5 kg. block of ice making the session 24-36 hours. I have never tried such a long period secured in such a restrictive position: I am looking forward to the challenge! It sounds deliciously uncomfortable.

obediently yours,

slave s

I am definitely NOT demurring at having to lie on a mattress soaked in my own urine for two days. My only concern was not to have to ruin the mattress of my bed. What I plan to do is to seal the mattress up in plastic sheeting, and place over the top of it several layers of old towelling, with the addition of an old sleeping back, folded flat, above. Not only will this arrangement stop soak up my urine, it will also retain it so that I will be spared none of the discomfort of lying in urine soaked bedclothes. Indeed, if I can find a way to do so, I will elevate the foot of the bed slightly, so the wet will spread underneath my body, just to prove to you that I have no borderlines.

Obviously, it will not be desirable for my to have to open my bowels while restrained, so I will be going on a fluids-only diet for two days before the session begins, so that there will be no residue of undigested material in my system.

I was rather worried that you would order me to have my wrists secured to opposite bed-posts; but, I am very glad that you did so! The key to the handcuffs will be frozen in a 5 litre container and will stand on the floor, lashed to the leg of the bed with duct tape. Fifty centimetre lengths of nylon cord will connect the key to the centre swivel link of the cuffs. I will have one such set up on each side of the bed as a fail safe. The containers have only narrow, bottle-neck openings, so I will have to wait until the ice has completely melted before getting access to the keys. By way of experiment, I put a container of water in the freezer last night, and took it out this morning, frozen solid, to see how long it would take to melt: after eighteen hours at room temperature, still over half the ice remains, so the session will probably go the full two days, if not a little more. I have already practised manipulating the key to the handcuffs with one hand, and it is quite feasible.

I think I have got around the drinking problem, by using a plastic fluid collection bag, (appropriated from work). These hold three litres of fluid and have a metre of thin plastic tubing attached. Full of water, this will be secured to the bed frame, near my head but just lower, in an inverted position. As you speculated, I will have to retain the adapter end of the tube in my mouth; I will do this by securing to my face under a large piece of surgical tape. I will also lightly smear myself with Vaseline to prevent skin damage from pressure sores.

To complete the whole enterprise will take three days, I would estimate, so I will not be able to 'go for it' until the end of next week, when I can reclaim some lost hours from the surgery.

Yours obediently,

slave s

You may be interested to know that I have had a small practise run, this evening. I attached the two pairs of handcuffs to the headposts of the bed, complete with their keys appended from their central swivels. I then lay on he bed, in the position in which I will be during the session, and secured my left hand to see how readily I could wind up the cord and manipulate the key in the lock: I then repeated the process with my right hand. After practising with each hand two or three times, and satisfying myself that I could reliably release myself, I tried securing both my wrists at the same time, to get something of what I will experience when the real time comes. I must admit that, within seconds of hearing the second pair of handcuffs click shut, I felt a wave of panic sweep over me, and I made haste to release myself. With both wrists secured, my reach was slightly different than before, so I fumbled for a while before successfully releasing myself. On a second try, everything went smoothly. I think I will try a more realistic practise run, with everything as it will be during the real session, but using only ice-tray blocks, thus limiting the time I am immobilised to an hour or so; then perhaps I will try with yoghurt pots to take the time up to four or five hours. I have also decided that, as an additional fail-safe measure, I will tape a spare set of keys to the headboard of the bed, within reach with one free hand.

I was able to test my drinking apparatus, and I am confident that it will work well enough. I intend drinking two to three litres of fluid in the two hours immediately before the beginning of the two day session: this will augment my water rations and, by guaranteeing that I have to urinate within a few hours of becoming immobilised, ensure that I am nicely uncomfortable for most of the two days.

I have been giving some though to how I will secure my ankle to the foot posts of the bed. I have decided to use crepe bandages since, after a trial run this evening, they seem to work well.

I have made arrangements to have next Friday off from the surgery, so my provisional timetable looks like this. I will have my last meal of solid food on Tuesday, at mid-day, so my digestive tract is completely empty by Thursday (I will also take the precaution of taking some codeine phosphate, just before the session begins, to constipate myself). I will subsist from Tuesday until Thursday on invalid liquid food; and only water until I am able to release myself. I leave work early on Thursday afternoon, so I will be home by three o'clock. I will then prepare my bedroom and the bed, and generally get everything ready: follow this by a long soak in the bath, until about five o'clock; and then make the final preparations. As I said, in the last two hours, I will be drinking two to three litres of fluid: I intend to be immobilised by 7:30pm at the latest. I have decided to have the curtains drawn for the session, so the only thing I will be able to see will be the time on my digital radio-alarm clock. I will have no distractions from my thoughts for the two days or so.

I will, of course, E-mail you, just before I begin. Please tell me if my preparations meet with your approval.

Yours obediently,

slave s

When I did get home, it only took an hour, I did not hurry things, but made my preparations very carefully, checking everything at least three times. However, after making sure my bladder and bowels were empty, I lay naked on the bed and began to secure my ankles with the crepe bandages. It was at this time that I began to get a very pronounced feeling of fear and foreboding; I could feel it in the pit of my stomach. However, I also felt the anticipation quite exhilarating. I actually passed the point of no return at 10:24am when I clicked my left wrist into its handcuff bracelet. I then went on to do the same for my right wrist; I found that with my ankles secured to the foot of the bed, I could not even stretch a free arm over to assist the other by getting access to the string suspended in the ice-block.

I have added an adaptation to the system to ensure that I cannot get at the key until all the ice has melted. On each side of the bed, I have screwed an eyelet, large enough to allow the key to pass through, but not if it is encased in a significant amount of ice. The cord from the handcuffs to the ice goes through this eyelet.

The first few moments after I had pressed the keeper of the cuff around my right wrist, and heard it click shut, were ones of barely suppressed panic. The thought that immediately sprang to my mind was that both of my release mechanisms had to work or I would be stranded on my bed indefinitely. However, when this had worn off, I began to think of my situation as a liberating one; there was nothing more I could do until the ice melted and I could, or could not, release myself. Slight panic did return when I realised that I had made a mistake. I had was not heating the room with the electrical heater, so the temperature was the usual 20 - 23 degrees. This meant that the ice would take longer to melt. Not only that, but I was a little bit chilly, as well.

After the initial panics had passed off, the experience became quite an exciting one. I just kept repeating to myself in my mind that, for the first time in my life, I was in bondage at the order of another person. This was the most significant experience of my life. These thoughts sent a wave of excitement through me, and my vagina started to secrete. I spent a lot of my time in sporadic and very frustrating attempts to masturbate by trying to move my thighs against each other. This did not work as my legs were secured too far apart. I did actually started lifting my body from the bed and bouncing up an down, more in frustration. As the session wore on, I did feel quite exhausted, both emotionally and physically; I think I dozed for a little while.

Regularly, throughout the session, I tried lifting the key cords: I was surprised at how slowly the ice was melting. At last, I was able to raise the key of the right handcuff through the eyelet at about 4:10pm. I had another then had another moment of panic as, after nearly six hours of being in the same position, my hand and arm was not so dextrous as usual, and it took me quite a lot of effort to position the key in the lock and release myself. However, I wasted no time in putting my free hand down to my pudenda and start masturbating. I can only say the orgasm I experience was quick and rather strenuous: I later found my left wrist was quite bruised were I had pulled it against its restraining cuff.

Eventually, I was able to release my felt wrist at 4:50; so I had been immobilised for six hours and twenty-four minutes. I unwound my crepe bandages, went to the lavatory, made myself a cup of tea, and had a long soak in the bath.

Other than remembering the heater, I have thought of some improvements for the session, next week. I would like to feel more restricted in my movements so that I cannot raise my body off the bed. I have thought of putting a belt around my waist and securing it either side with a cord running underneath the bed. I still feel very proud and excited with what has happened to me today: I cannot wait for the real ordeal, next week.

Your obedient slave,

slave s

I think that I may have given an exaggerated impression of the difficulties I had releasing myself, it was just that I was unprepared for them. One of the advantages of the practise session was to point up unsuspected problems, thus allowing to plan for them. I must admit that I did consider have another, longer practise session, perhaps of twelve hours. However, not only is there not enough time for this, my pride will not allow me to delay any further. I have thought very deeply about what I will be doing, and I am acutely aware of the many dangers involved; although I must admit that gambling on the potential awful consequences is part of the thrill.

I have considered providing myself with a addition safety measure for use in dire emergency. I have thought of taping my mobile phone within reach of one of my hands, but with the key pad covered so that I could only press the emergency services call button. This way I could summon help if the worst came to the worst and my life was in danger; but I could not use it frivolously as the consequences of public exposure are beyond contemplation. I am in two minds about doing this, as it seems to be cheating in some way. I would like to know what you think about this idea; if you say no, I will not do it. You did say that part of the thrill for you was contemplating the possibility of my not being able to release myself; I would not like to spoil your enjoyment of my ordeal.

In conclusion: yes, I will definitely be going ahead with the two-day session next week, as scheduled. It is a challenge to my endurance and submission that I know I will regret not meeting.

Obediently yours,

slave s

Of course, you are right, my bondage must be completely inescapable before the time is up. However, since the emergency button only calls the police, using it would probably finish my career! But as a matter of principle, the remote possibility of premature release would exist, and should not. After thinking about the problem, and reading the instruction manual to my mobile phone, I have come up with two contingency plans.

Firstly, I have a digital timer which I use attached to my radio to record programmes while I am out (nobody seems to make a audio tape recorder with a timer, like they do on a video). I will put this into a socket in my bedroom and set the timer to turn on the electricity on, say mid-day on Sunday. Into the socket of the timer I will plug the mains adapter of my mobile phone. I then remove the battery pack of the phone, but plug it into the mains adapter. This way, I cannot use the phone until the timer turns on the electricity. This method does have also have the advantage that I will not have to prevent myself from using all the dial keys, so, in an emergency, I can call someone more understanding than the police!

Secondly, I have a lady who comes in to clean for me, usually on Tuesdays. I will ask to come in on Monday, instead. She has a key to let herself in, so if I have not been able to get myself free by then, I have her as a last resort.

Have a nice time, this week, wherever you are going. I hope you will be thinking of me. I will send you a message as soon as I have released myself.

Obediently yours,

slave s

Technically, the session went very well. There was nearly four hours between my being able to release my left and right wrists; I had not expected such a difference. I had no trouble recovering the keys and releasing myself. I think the practise session of last week was invaluable experience. I was able to be more patient, taking my time carrying out the manipulations necessary to wind up the keys and work the lock mechanisms. The only real problem was with my drinking apparatus. The surgical tape that I had used to secure the tube from the catheter bag to my face came unstuck yesterday, probably due to the amount of sweat and grease on my skin, so I was without anything to drink for the last half day.

Physically, I can say that I have never spent such a miserably uncomfortable two days in all my life. My feet, and especially my ankles, became very irritated and itchy under the crepe-bandages; and the webbing belt around my waist has chaffed me quite badly after it had become soaked in urine. As I predicted, I had to urinate within an hour or two of being immobilised, and about five times subsequently. As I had managed to elevate the foot of the bed, the wetness very quickly spread up my back to my shoulders and even into my hair. Even though I had liberally coated my skin with barrier cream, my shoulders are very sore, as is my entire backside.

By this evening, my room and I smelled as if someone had been gutting fish in it. I have had to open wide both windows to get in some fresh air. The additional coverings of the bed I had just put into dustbin bags and put out for collection by the dustmen tomorrow. I feel disgustingly dirty and smelly and I am looking forward to a good, long soak in the bath. I feel very stiff and cramped; indeed, I did have some cramping pains in my legs and thighs over the last two days.

If you will not be angry, I will describe my experiences in detail tomorrow, when I am rested and can think more clearly.

Your obedient slave,

slave s

If I already had a fascination for bondage, my recent experience has converted this into a serious addiction. I knew in my heart that two days in bondage would either make or break my enthusiasm for it: I can definitely say that it has made it! Not only do I want to do it again, actually I 'need' to. The session engendered such intense physical, emotional and psychological responses in me that, to use the terminology of drug addiction, I am now 'hooked' and in need of regular 'fixes'. I am only just 'coming down' from a 'high' that has lasted since last week. Although I have been aware of what was going to happen to me since we first mentioned it, the reality struck home when I began the actual preparations last Monday. To make sure that my digestive system would be empty at the beginning of the session, I decided to my evening meal on Monday my 'last supper'. I cooked myself dhal and roti, one of my favourites and, as I ate it, I became acutely aware that this would be my last solid food until the weekend. Although I gave myself glucose and other fortified drinks, I was feeling a little light-headed by Thursday.

I felt completely focused on the coming session that I found it hard to concentrate on anything else. It is strange that I accepted the inevitability of the forthcoming experience with absolute certainty, I never seriously considered that I might not go through with it. There are two reasons for this, I think: firstly, I was so excited by the idea of the whole thing that I wanted to do it for myself; secondly, I am so thrilled by at last being able to feel that I am a slave under the discipline of absolute obedience, that to disobey your orders would have broken the spell that I have so long dreamed of being under. You are my Master and I will obey you, without question.

By Thursday evening, when I wrote to you, I was literally shaking with a delicious mixture of apprehension and exhilaration. This sensation carried me through the final moments, like an automaton, until just after I had secured both my wrists, when I passed the point of no return. Then, the reality of my situation hit me like a bucket of cold water dashed in my face. I suddenly became acutely aware that I had no escape for maybe two days. An icy wave of panic rose up inside me as unthinkable possibilities flooded into my mind; what if the house burned down, or someone came in, or I was taken ill, etc. I was so frightened that I nearly vomited. I must have spent the first half-hour in a state of terror. However, almost imperceptibly, this metamorphosed into a state of mounting physical arousal: gradually my terror at having no possible escape turned into a feeling near-ecstasy that this was so. This then turned into a painful feeling of frustration because I could not turn my feelings of arousal into physical sensations by masturbating. I fantasised intensely on what it would be like to have you there to sexually stimulate me and bring me to orgasm. I have read many accounts of what it feels like to be brought to orgasm when bound; now I know that I must experience this for myself.

After this initial rush of sensation had ebbed away, I became aware that my bladder was distended, and that I had to urinate. Even though I had deliberately brought on this situation by drinking lots of fluid just before starting the session, I still held off for as long as I could. Nevertheless, I was very excited when I did finally yield to the inevitable and relax my bladder muscles. My urine burst out of my in a quick, warm gush, followed by the spreading feeling of wetness which soon reached under my bottom back. Very soon, though, the warmth turned to a damp cold feeling which rapidly became very uncomfortable. I could not shift my body to relieve this as I had pulled the ropes securing my waist belt to the bed-frame so tight that I was held firm against the mattress. This feeling was very unpleasant, so much so that I held out against the need to urinate to put off having to go through it; in all, though, I had to endure it five times. By Friday morning, the wetness had reached up to my head and started soaking into my hair; by the evening, I was aware that I was stinking.

I did manage to sleep for a few hours early on Friday morning and on the following two nights. I had drawn the curtains in my bedroom, so there was little light. For most of the time, the external world ceased to exist for me, obliterated by my increasingly uncomfortable situation. I did not even think much about the prospect of release as it seemed so remote. I was as physically dejected as I have ever been, but I had no choice to endure. On Saturday morning, I tried lifting the cords attached to the keys, but found they would not move, being still firmly stuck in the ice; so I knew that I was in for a long session. However, even though I felt physically wretched, I never lost the sense of exhilaration, even pride, at what was happening to me and the fact that I was enduring it.

I spent much time thinking about the future. One thing that was uppermost n my mind was the necessity of being secured in a form of bondage from which only you can release me. Even though I knew that I would have to the ice to melt, which might be later rather than sooner, I always had the knowledge that it would eventually melt, and I would be free. How much greater would be the feeling of helplessness if I knew that my release depended entirely on your whim. I began to think of ways of making this possible, such as you sending me combination padlocks so that I could not escape until you posted or telephoned me with the sequence of numbers. However, this would only work once for each set of locks. I have thought of a way of using electronic locks, but I need to do some more research before I know whether this is feasible. Would it give you a thrill, knowing that I was helplessly bond and only you could release me? I know that I would? Have you any ideas as to how we could achieve this?

If it pleases you, would you design my next session for me? I am not sure if it would be feasible to make the session longer, but I certainly feel that I could endure and enjoy much harsher conditions. On reflection, I found that I actually enjoyed being very uncomfortable much more than I thought that I would.

Please get in touch with me soon. Obediently yours,

slave s

Combination locks are quite common in this country, they are used to secure bicycles to railings, having the advantage that there is no key to mislay. Mostly they have four digit combinations, from 0000 to 9999. There is no need to worry about my spending my time in bondage trying to find the sequence of numbers; even if I could alter the number sequence and pull the lock once every second, it could take me 9999 seconds, or 2.8 hours to find each one, so using say for locks would be quite secure. You are right though, using a lock with a six number sequence would be better, as then each lock could take 11.5 days to open. However, using simple mechanical combination locks would be unsatisfactory as each one could only be used once, as I would have to be given the number sequence to release myself.

There are locks with sonic keys, similar to those used to work the central locking device on cars, where the key-pad sends the locking mechanism a sequence of sound pulses. I could have a small, steel cabinet, fitted with such a lock, in which I would put the keys to my padlocks. When you wished to release me, I could put the telephone receiver near the lock and you could send the pulse-sequence to it. This does have the drawback that sending the sound-sequence over a telephone line could distort it so that it would not work; but this does not seem to be a problem for modems.

Another possibility (I have done a lot of research, you see!) would be to use one of those very sophisticated electronic locks such as are used on safes. These use a continually changing number sequence to operate them, every time the lock is used, the combination to release it changes according to a pre-programmed algorithm. This way, if you sent me the lock, but kept the instructions with the algorithm, I would have to wait until you 'phoned me with the new sequence, every time. Have you any ideas?

My ambition is to find a method by which you and I would have the satisfaction of knowing that, once in bondage, the only possibility of release was under your control. Also, the idea of my being able to relay my experiences to you as they happen, is very appealing; you could also give me orders, etc.

Obediently yours,

slave s

Thank you for your ideas. Forgive me if I say that I am not too keen on the idea of involving someone else to release me. Not only would this spoil my sensation of being under your direct control, but I do not know anyone whom I would want to know my secret. I have thought of posting the keys to myself, but our postal system is just too unreliable. I tried an experiment in which I posted several self-addressed envelopes, and some of them took five days to return to me, even when posted locally.

I very much like the sound of your cellar idea; I do not have a cellar, but I do have a large double garage. I have already worked out a scene. I will attach a pair of handcuffs and a one-metre length of chain to d-rings on the back of a waist belt. Since the garage is at the end of the garden, I will have to go their in something like a tracksuit. Once inside, I will strip myself naked, putting the clothes on a hook, out of the way. I will then put on he waist belt, wrap the chain around each ankle and secure it with a padlock. This arrangement holds my within about half a metre of my wrists. I will then blindfold myself using two pieces of 10cm surgical tape and cotton wool. I will throw each of the two keys separately into the body of the garage, not being able to see where they land. Lastly, I will secure my wrists in the handcuffs. I will then have to slither around the floor, trying to find the keys by touch. Since the concrete floor and the air around me will be very cold, I will have an incentive to work quickly. What do you think of the idea?

Obediently yours,

slave s

Obediently yours,

slave s